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Controlling Anger in Relationships

Close, trusting relationships with others help you avoid depression after life stresses and help prevent illness, speed recovery, and promote longevity. But a bad relationship can cause depression and make your life seem like hell. Unfortunately, men with bad tempers cause a great deal of the stresses women face today. Find out how you can improve an angry man.

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Controlling Anger Cont'd

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In the best relationships, the partners calmly and tactfully talk about irritations, disagreements, and conflicts without blaming each other and then problem solve, negotiate, and compromise. Occasional arguments with yelling can feel good when it unearths important issues and leads to problem solving, but it often results in hurt feelings, sabotages problem solving so that problems become chronic, damages trust and closeness, and may lead to a partner feeling very justified in lying or deceiving by omission.

Instead, develop a confiding relationship of sharing feelings, not just facts, and receiving acceptance, understanding, and emotional support from each other. Research shows sharing feelings is much more important to closeness and happiness in relationships than the sharing of facts.

If you need to control your anger, this information will show you Problem Solving Skills, Communication Problems to Avoid and so much more.

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Conflict and Anger
Sheri & Bob Stritof,

Every marriage relationship will have marital conflict and hostility during difficult times. Learning how to handle these problems, knowing when to seek a therapist's help and being able to forgive are some of the keys to making matrimony successful.

A collection of hand picked anger related links by marriage guides Sheri & Bob Stritof.

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Dealing with Anger In Relationships
Susie and Otto Collins

Everyone gets angry. Some people show it openly and others don’t. If you are one of
those people who claim you don’t get angry- you’re either not in touch with your
emotions or you are lying.

In relationship, Anger can be either healthy or unhealthy. Anger is just an emotion. How you process it is what determines whether it becomes a tool for growth or a source of pain and destruction.

In this society anger is perceived as a negative emotion. If you are a person who expresses anger, society would tell you that you are someone who can’t control your emotions and can’t control your behavior.

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Walmsley & Associates

Anger is a natural human emotion, but often people do not know how to express anger without attacking or belittling the person who may have criticized them.

Anger has a purpose - it tells you when something is wrong.

Feeling angry about an injustice could encourage someone to take positive steps to correct it.

Anger, appropriately used, can provide an opportunity to make grievances known, solve problems, correct an imbalance of power in a relationship, and restore hurt pride. Anger energy, when used properly, may encourage positive change.

Anger when transformed into unresolved hostility, either outwardly toward others or inwardly toward yourself, can result in serious physical ailments, severe emotional conflicts, greatly diminished ability to function at school or work, violence, and occasionally suicide or homicide.

Read more and test your Knowledge of Anger


Getting Mad - A new study shows women can keep anger in and still be OK.
Amy Standen

Deborah Cox comes from a small, conservative town in the South. Growing up, she sensed that many women of her parents' generation were "infinitely furious," stockpiling their grievances like canned vegetables. It was, she felt, a simmering frustration born of and sustained by the women's lack of influence in their community. As long as the women remained silent about the cause of their anger, they failed to take action on their own behalf

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Take the Anger Test

Natural Anger

Anger is a natural emotion or feeling. We feel anger whenever we are BLOCKED from getting something we want. It is good for us because it PROTECTS us from threat,
IT REMINDS US THAT WE HAVE POWER to overcome obstacles, and it gives us a MEASURE of how important it is for us to get what we want.

Whenever we are blocked from something we want,
a part of our energy goes into feeling anger.

It can range from intense anger at being blocked from something important (like life itself)
to minimal anger at small blocks over slight wants.

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