Stories of Infidelity from the Cheaters
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RESPONSE TO "I
WANT THIS GUY TO GET WHAT'S COMING TO HIM"
Think about your
children and how it will effect them
Trust me...don't get involved with anyone
online...it only leads to heartache and infidelity...I hurt my
husband and children terribly and I'm so sorry for that now. I
didn't meet this guy I met online in person...I almost did...but
couldn't go through with it....my husband and I split for a while
and then I finally came to my senses when I ended up in a mental
hospital for depression. It got so that all I did was chat online
and never slept and it finally caught up with me. My advice would
be to never even put yourself in a situation like this.....EVER! If
a man flatters you and you don't get that at home, it feels
good....but if a man online drops you a line like that...you better
bet that you aren't the ONLY ONE! On the other hand I know that
some online relationships do work...but if you are married and you
put yourself in that position(vulnerable)...you will get burnt
eventually....so don't even go there....trust me....IT'S NOT Worth
IT!!!!! If you aren't happy in your marriage...try
counseling...anything but computer dating...it definitely will not
help your marriage! Think about your children and how it will
effect them...not to mention the other people around you that you
love. You become withdrawn....and don't realize it until you are
too far in....Take this advice from someone who knows! It's not
Sincerely, I've learned my lesson
I am a cheater and I
don't know how to stop.
I've been married for 10 years and have 2 kids. A friend introduced me
to msn chat room about two years ago. It looked like a lot of fun. My
husband even got a kick out of it. But then it started becoming a
addiction for me. I even downloaded it at work and started chatting
there. And thats where I met him. He came across with a nasty comment
at first and I told him off. He apologized up and down and started
being so polite and extremely funny. We just clicked. I gave him my
email and he gave me his. We started mailing each other very long
emails every single day. I just couldn't get enough of him and he made
it seem like he couldn't get enough of me. Then I made the mistake of
giving him my work number. I just had to hear his voice. After mailing
each other for four months, he called me at work. We've sent picture to
each other. I even open up my own PO Box because he wanted to send me
gifts. We live 2,000 miles away from each other but that didn't seem to
matter. At first I didn't believe he wasn't married because he told me
he couldn't call me from home because of his parents. I thought, what
is a 28 years old guy doing living with his parents. He's a certain
religion and they are opposed to relationships other then their own
religion. Well he no longer lives with his parents because he started
his first year of residency in another state. Now he wants to talk to
me on the phone more often. But I can't because I'm married and he
doesn't know that. I keep coming up with excuses every night. But it
did get to the point where we text each other and every chance I get I
call him from my cell. He even knows my home number but swears he'll
never use it. My internet man and I have been going together for almost
two years now. And yes we have phone sex whenever we get the chance. He
keeps telling me he'll pay for my air ticket just to go see him. We
tell each other "I love you" a lot. I've tried breaking it off with him
using any excuse I can but he keeps calling me back and begging me
back. I can't stay away. Please someone advise me. Don't get after me,
just advise me. I need to stop this. It's controlling my life and I see
that, but I can't seem to do anything about it. I'm weak and I don't
want to hurt my husband and kids anymore. Please help....
I discovered online
chat and was instantly intrigued
This is something everyone should read - I
have seen both sides of the coin. About 9 years ago when I was
single and very naive, I discovered online chat and was instantly
intrigued. Soon, I met and began an online relationship with a
handsome, charming (aren't they always?), fascinating man who said
he adored me and showered me with gifts. After 6 months, he
convinced me to move across the country to be with him. I was truly
in a fantasy world, and felt like a princess. After I sold my
things and moved, the fantasy began to crumble after 3 months. His
false persona started to fade to reality, and I discovered that he
actually had MANY online love interests, and was, indeed, deeply
addicted to internet porn, chat, and phone sex. When I confronted
him, he made every excuse he could think of to make me believe I
was insane and imagining everything. I felt like a fool for falling
into the whole mess. Having made such a huge change in my life, and
feeling too stubborn and embarrassed to admit I had made such a
terrible mistake in judgment, I stuck it out for 5 more months! We
were both in denial. He denied anything was going on, and I didn't
want to face it. He was so clever and deviant, I had no way to
prove he was actually doing anything wrong. My online "soul mate"
became increasingly verbally abusive, manipulative, and distant. He
eventually just became careless. By the time I moved out, I had
surmised through cell phone bills, credit card receipts, and A LOT
of desperate attempts to link him to someone real, I was able to
prove to myself that he was having affairs - both online and
offline - with as many as 10 other women. I actually contacted a
few of them and they were shocked to find out he had a live-in
girlfriend. He had even given them false names. The bottom line is,
I wish I had a product like this back then. It would have saved me
a lot of grief. Yes, I could've used better judgment, but after
reading the other testimonies, it sounds like I was not alone in my
I almost broke up a
I am now glad I personally woke up, and did
not do it. I am a divorced 37 yr old woman. I remember opening my
computer for the very first time, tried chat, and to my surprise,
met a wonderful man. He is married, has two children, and a
wife........I am the one with whom he cheats his wife with, for our
relationship went on from the net, to meeting in person, and we
both fell in passionate love. But after two years of waiting and
hoping, I terminated the relationship. It was not right. I knew he
did not want to leave his kids. I did not want him to chose between
both. There is a six hour drive between us. He lives in the states,
and I live in Canada. The situation was complicated more and more.
We were seeing each other often in the first year, until his wife
found out.......then I felt bad, all the trouble he was having
cause of me. We continued chatting over the net, but it was going
nowhere, I admit getting lonelier by the second. He was not here
with me. I luckily took time off on my own, and decided I had to
terminate the relationship. I had asked him to let me go. And he
did. His wife is still there with him at home, and the kids are
there too. I am glad it is over, and I did not go down to break up
a family. I woke up, knowing it could not have gone further, even
if he had told me he was breathing every second for us to be
together one day. Today, I have met another man, closer to home I
might add, and I feel free, honest, and truly in love. To all the
women out there........think for a moment before getting involved
with a married man, the consequences are so bad. Think of their
children. That is what helped me. There are tons of available men
out there. Please think it over before ever cheating on someone. It
hurts so much. I know my heart got broken by him, and he has taken
a piece of my heart away forever. That cannot be repaired ever. I
still think of him, I still look at his picture from time to time,
wondering simply WHY. Why did I take this chance. I now regret it
even having started the relationship. It hurt me more than her.
Please think always before reacting. I was on the other side of the
medal, and boy is the road long.
RESPONSE TO "I WANT
THIS GUY TO GET WHAT'S COMING TO HIM"
First, make sure YOU break off all ties with
him -if you cannot do this, what you are probably feeling is guilt,
not empathy toward the "poor" wife. Second, if you really want to
advise her (wife) think over the issue of responsibility - he may
have lied to you, but now you know the truth. Call her yourself, it
will have more impact if you own the problem as well as hold him
accountable to her. - an interested reader
I think that his wife should have known that he was cheating....
recently started working for a road construction company about 5 mo. ago. well
to make a long story short I've been sleeping with my supervisor who is married
and recently had a child in august. well we were really into each other alot we
called each other every day and he would always come and see me no matter what.
have you ever heard that song they stand just a little to close and talk just
a little to loud well that was us and the company we worked for they really knew
something was going on when they recieved his company phone bill that was 2500.
dollars just from calling me. so they demoted him to a heavy equipment operator
and soon after somebody told his wife about us and he thinks it was me and wont
talk to me now. I think that his wife should have known that he was cheating on
her anyway and for him to cheat on his wife for 4 months than obviously he didnt
love her that much anyways. I relly loved this guy and dont know what to do.
I have not cheated - YET....
I have not cheated - YET. But, I've been giving it more and more thought lately - to my shame. It has NOTHING to do with how much I love my wife. I love her very much and go above and beyond the call in showing her every day. And I do believe that she loves me, too.
I guess I should start from the start: We've been together for about 7 years and the first 3 were great! I can honestly say that I never had even the mildest thoughts of cheating on her. I was incredibly happy with our lives together - including our sexual relationship. The past 3 1/2 years are another story.
She has lost all apetite for sex. She swears that it's not just me but that she simply has no sex drive now. Of course, since I'm the only one she's supposed to be having sex with, the result is the same either way. But what really upsets me about this is that it seems as though she has no desire to correct this problem - and has even implied that I'm just expecting too much. Just for reference, we have sex about once every three months and have gone as long as 4 1/2 months between sessions. And, even when we do have sex, it's not intimacy or love; it's "Fine! Let's get this overwith so I can get some sleep!" or she'll just lay there while I 'do' her. I usually feel worse afterwards than I did before. TIP - Ladies, if you don't have a sex drive, don't just put out for your man until you get that corrected. Trust me, if you're not enjoying it - neither is he! And, if he is enjoying it, then it's not love he feels for you!
So that brings us back to today - and my thoughts of cheating. I see other women that have that spark in their eye and you just know that they enjoy sex to it's fullest. And I'm just dying from envy! What I would not give to have a woman look at me again with that desire. And, if you're thinking that I'm some slob that has just let himself go to pot since we got married, I can honestly say that other than my hair thining a bit I look just as I did the day we met. I'm 6' 1" tall, 180# and athletic. And, when I said that our sex life was wonderful before, that includes her being very adventurous! She once pleased me orally in the bedroom while a repairman was working on the furnace downstairs - without the slightest provocation from me, no less! How I miss those days!
So, I guess the moral of this story is that you can't tell your spouse, "You're not getting any from me!" and then truly expect them NOT to go find it somewhere else! Humans are sexual creatures! Even those who deny themselves that pleasure (such as priests, nuns, etc.) still have the desire - they just refrain from acting on those desires. That's why it's called a 'sacrifice'.
whats wrong with everyone
there.. i have cheated on mostly all the girls i have been with.. but afterwords
i feel guilty as hell and i think to myself that i should enjoy being a player
like this.. but the truth is i don't.. but i wish i could.. whats wrong with everyone
today, we shouldnt cheat!
guess I got what I deserved because I was a "cheater"....
really glad to have "chanced" upon this site. It was a comfort go read
the messages here and it made me feel better to hear the different stories and
realize I was not alone (I knew I wasn't but it's hard to find those of us whose
lives have been crushed from our men). I guess I got what I deserved because I
was a "cheater". I was in a marriage for two years and was not in love
with my husband so I did go on the computer for attention. I would see these women
that would hook up with these guys online and thought they were so stupid, "I
would never do that!". Well, I did. He was from a different state and I felt
that we were "close" because we talked so often. I felt I really knew
him. We moved in together without even meeting in person. He was younger but I
was in love. Six months after being together he told me he went to work one day,
that night his boss called wanting to know if he would be in the next day since
he was off this day sick. Imagine my surprise. He told me that he had actually
went out with some guy friends and was afraid to tell me, afraid I'd get mad (I
never complained about what he did or did not do). To make a long story short,
turns out he went to meet his "online love" from before me. I found
this out because I figured out his email password and read her letters. I started
packing it up to leave but he talked me into staying. Saying she was a "good
friend". I got her home phone number from him and made him call her husband
to tell them they had met, which he did and then I spoke to the husband. Of course,
I thought it was over. Well, let me tell you...it didn't end there. We have been
together for several years now and only 4 months ago I found phone numbers in
his wallet. One was a stripper, one from the other lady in his life. The letters
I have found on his computer are crushing. He always told me that he can't be
responsible for what others write, only what he does. Well, I was able to crack
his other email address (cheaters love to have multiple addresses) and finally
saw what he had wrote and it crushed me. Things like "I'll love you forever"
not to mention the horrible things he said about me. I found a full frontal naked
picture on his computer of himself. His excuse...I was making a Valentine card
for you hon. I never believed him but couldn't prove it so I let it go. He told
me that he would NEVER send naked pictures to anyone. That was wrong too of course.
We use to play games with others in tournaments and I found out that all the women
had that picture. One night he said he got drunk and spent the night at his friends,
when I received the cell bill I found that was a lie, he called me that morning
(after I threatened to report my car stolen to the police) from a hotel in Vegas.
This last incident with the girls phone numbers and seeing what he wrote in email
was the final straw. I not only threw the lying cheat out of my home, I threw
his sorry ass in jail as well.
felt as if a huge burden had been lifted because I have been dealing with internet
affairs with him for three years. I started feeling good about myself again because
cheaters do make us feel horrible about ourselves. We are always asking them "what's
so bad about me? what does she have that I don't?" We start feeling ugly
and worthless. We turn from these nice happy go lucky people into depressed, horrible
people...I wanted to mess up the women who were involved with him so bad. I would
never do what they did. Destroy homes like that. Then again, is it there fault?
No, it was his. So, after several months of starting to feel good about myself
again, what do I do? I went back with him. He talked me into going to a counselor
with him. I should have just said no but I didn't. In our discussions this is
what I found out...his 2nd wife had left him for another man and it crushed him.
Made him feel undesirable. At least that's his excuse. He did admit in counseling
that he is an internet addict. That he craves attention and can't help himself.
He says he's different now and when he gets bored, he'll do something else like
work on the cars.
we are together. We have two computeres and neither are hooked up. Are things
better? Is he cheating? Am I glad I hung in there? I don't feel he is cheating
and he may never again. However, I don't feel it will last. He could be a saint
right now but he ruined my trust. I can and never will trust him again. I think
it's sickening that we can't have a computer hooked up in our house any longer
because he can't control himself. I think it's sad that I have become the type
of woman that has to check his wallet and pants to see what he is up to. If your
man is like this, run, run as fast and as far as you can. Don't let him back because
you can never recover that which is lost. For those of you that do cheat, I truly
believe what comes around goes around and hope and wish that every single one
of you feels the hurt that we have had to go through. Women/men always look good
on the internet because you don't have the daily challenges real life relationships
do. If you are thinking of cheating, is it worth it? Is it worth losing the love
of significant other? I don't believe that crap that I read on here about us women
deserve it because we aren't doing our men right. It's what it's always come down
to...most men think with their penis.
He thinks kinky sex is doing it with the lights on...
hate to say it.. but i cheat on my husband. He thinks kinky sex is doing it with
the lights on.. if only he knew.
mind your husband thinking kinky sex is doing it with the lights on....
mind your husband thinking kinky sex is doing it with the lights on, we think
kinky sex is cybering with women and pretending we are guys, it's hilarious cos
we send pic's through of various guys an all!! it's a hoot, you would not believe
the things that are said, but to us the laugh is on them :-)
recently began having an affair with my cousins husband...
a 25 yr old mother of 2 who has been married for 8 yrs..i recently began having
an affair with my cousins husband...i know in my head i wouldnt appreciate someone
doing me this way but at the same time i feel like if u ladies cant take care
of ur man ...someone else will.
always cheat on my men and i try so hard not to....
people...i am a cheat. Its not because i dont love my man its because i love the
excitement and adrelinen rush. I always cheat on my men and i try so hard not
to. I am engaged now and cheated on my fiance with my ex-husband. It happens.
I never want my fiance to leave me. If my fiance ever cheats on me he will be
out the door...cause i know once a cheat always a cheat!
I snuck out the front door, there was a huge camera on a tripod in the street...
started to blame my husband for my unhappiness. I was on an emotional roller coaster,
and he was an easy target. I told him that I wanted a divorce, and threw him out.
I started to go out to clubs to dance and would do the stupidest things when I
drank. One night, I drove to a friend from work's home drunk. I ended up sleeping
with him, but don't remember the details. I did wake up really disoriented. When
I snuck out the front door, there was a huge camera on a tripod in the street.
My husband had watched everything from outside and called his friend to bring
a camera. He was following me around. He told me that he was even more attracted
to me, and wanted to get back together. We did for a while, but a few months later
I didn't come home one night. I had been at a party, and was up all night. He
flipped out, and wanted a divorce. I was freaking out, and ended up overdosing
on pills twice in one month. I spent a month in a psychiatric hospital. I found
out that I am bipolar, and antidepressants alone were making me worse. We are
back together now, but it is hard to get over such hurtful events.
are you women so surprised when you find out your man is having an affair...
are you women so surprised when you find out your man is having an affair, have
you ever thought of the reason for his doing so.Usually its because youv'e become
boring , the sex you used to have is just a dream , i dare say he has tried to"fire"
it up on ocassions only to be told , "I have a headache" " Don.t
be silly , I'm not doing that". Don't forget , for every man cheating there
has to be a woman, well in most cases anyway. Why dont you women try a little
harder. I will tell you one thing for sure, should YOU ever cheat on your man
I bet you any money you like you would do things with your lover that you wouldn't
dream of doing with your man, and that ladies is why we men cheat. This message
is also aimed at the men who are being cheated on , get it together or you will
lose her, but as the old saying goes. "
Familiarity breeds contempt" Just
think on that then go out and enjoy the forbidden fruits of sex.
WANT THIS GUY TO GET WHAT'S COMING TO HIM...
PLEASE PLEASE HELP ME. I JUST FOUND OUT THE GUY I'VE BEEN SEEING, ACTUALLY EXCLUSIVE
WITH FOR ALMOST THREE MONTHS IS STILL MARRIED! THIS IS NOT THE FIRST TIME HE HAS
DONE THIS APPARENTLY, THEY ALMOST GOT DIVORCED NOT A YEAR AGO BECAUSE HE GOT CAUGHT
WITH SOME GIRL NOT HALF HIS AGE! I FEEL HORRIBLE BUT ID DIDN'T KNOW. I WANT TO
TELL THIS POOR WOMAN, SHE HAS TWO KIDS WITH THIS GUY. SHE WAS GOOD ENOUGH TO FORIVE
HIM ONCE, I HOPE SHE GETS SMART THIS TIME AND LEAVES THIS PATHETIC LOSER. I KNOW
I WOULD WANT TO KNOW, BUT I DON'T KNOW HOW TO TELL HER SO IT DOESN'T COME BACK
TO ME. DOES ANYONE KNOW A WAY I COULD DO THIS ANONYMOUSLY? PLEASE HELP- I WANT
THIS GUY TO GET WHAT'S COMING TO HIM- WHAT A SCUMMER!
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