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True Stories of Cheating Wives
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I am pretty angry you might say, I've been married for 15 years now and was told a few weeks ago that my wife confided in someone at work about some personal problems with our family. What she is telling me is that they are just friends but she feels that she loves this person much like a person would love their doctor. What in the hell is that suppose to mean? In one breath she tells me that she loves me and in another she tells me this. I have a sick feeling that she has had a affair with this person and now feels guilty about it. I have tried to forgive her but still wonder if this is relationship is going on. Our sex life is bad, she will still have sex because she feels it is her obligation but their is no feelings their. In my heart I want to believe her but in my mind I know I have to be real. I would like to catch them if I could and find out what was really said in the e-mail correspondence, but they correspond at work. I guess I am still looking for the truth. And if she really does just feel guilty about having feelings for another person is that cheating too. I think so, especially when she does not have the same feelings for her husband. Thanks for listening, Mixed up
Beginning of 2001 my wife of 18 years decided to have an affair (emotional investment and sexual investment, either of which constitute an affair)with one of her employees. I didn't find out about it until the sexual part had slacked off. She was still in love with him and wanted to be with him 9 months later. That's when I told her I had known and had been following her since month 8. His wife was pregnant and this had devastated my wife because she thought they would be together at some point. In month 2, she told me she didn't want to be married anymore, she wasn't happy. I talked her into counseling which we began a couple months later. In which she basically said she didn't want to try to save the marriage. When I told her that I was having trouble believing that someday I may see her with someone new, She assured me the whole time that she didn't want another relationship with anyone. We were growing further apart, and finally in month 10, I told her I knew, she denied at first, then admitted it. Told me their relationship was the kind we hadn't had for years. I had already cut the strings to the relationship and demanded she move out and leave me and our two kids (16 and 10) in the house. After six months we would pursue joint custody. If she refused, I would blow the whistle to everyone (family, kids, her employer, friends) and anyone who would care about hearing/seeing my proof. (Money spent, Bills unpaid) I asked her still to give it one more chance. She agreed, but was sick for the next few days. So I told her it was Ok. Her heart wasn't in it, divorce was best. A week later, she decided on her own to try again. We did, for about a year. Things were better than they had been in years. Mutual Communication, Openness, helpfulness, caring, all beyond what we had experienced for years. We had married young, and I felt like we were mature enough to get beyond this. But, I can't feel like a husband and lover to her anymore. It's gone, Iíve tried to get it back. Keeping the family together would be the best thing to do. But I can't. I have been out of the house for about 6 weeks (Separated). It's tough. On the kids especially. But staying with her because of the kids isn't right for anyone. We'll take time and see what happens.
My wife and I have been married for 7 years. I have been in the military for 9. One of the occupational hazards of being in the military is the long periods of time away from home, training for war. I had been deployed to another installation to qualify tank gunnery which required me to be away for 6 weeks. I had the opportunity to return home on the weekends during which time my wife would rather sleep than spend time with me. When I returned from gunnery, I was in line to get promoted to the next rank. When my new rank was pinned on, my wife refused to kiss me in front of my unit. I didn't realize anything was wrong until the neighbors broke down and told me what my wife had confessed to them, that she was having an affair with one of the other soldiers in my unit. When I confronted her with it she denied it, and being the loving supportive husband I am, I defended my wifeís honor. Weeks went by and she accused me of having an affair when I told her about a woman I had met and asked for clear boundaries as to her definition of infidelity. She volunteered to leave in order to allow me "freedom" to develop the relationship with this woman. While packing her stuff, I explained that I had no interest in starting a new relationship and that I just didn't want the same thing to happen to her that had happened to me. (The neighbors spreading rumors.) Thatís when I found out that she had written a love note about him. Not to him, just about him. I'm lost... People tell me to leave her until I tell them I have three young children.
I have been married for thirty years. When I met my wife, she was the sweetest thing Iíd ever known. She told me she had never been with another man sexually. I had been married for six years when I learned, quite by accident, overhearing a conversation, that my wife and her best friend were frat house pass arounds. I have never said a word, but all these years it has eaten me inside. I dont know if itís possible, but you could say that cheating is possible if you donít come to the marriage with absolute honesty.
Some 25 years ago my wife had an affair with a man and it took her 27 years for her to tell me she was in love with him, he is now deceased and even though I found out about the affair the first night as he had left a beard burn on her she will not openly talk to me about her affair, she say they only made love 1 time but stayed in touch on the phone and other ways with him for 13 years, I can forgive the affair but not the lying, does any women out there believe she had sex only 1 time in the 13 years they were in touch, I donít want to get in to any details but the first time they met he got her under clothes down and her bra off but says they didnít do anything other than make out, I up till then was the only man she had ever had sex with, I just want her to tell me the truth, its been a miserable 25 years, why does she just not admit all that they done so we can get on with our lives and try to be happy, I donít want to know the details but just what they did, am I wrong for wanting to know?
In April of 1984 my wife informed me of an affair that she had with a guy she dated when she was in high school and a one night stand with a friend of her sister. She also told me about making out with other men during this period of probably about three years. She said she couldn't live with the guilt. Since then there have been no other affairs. Now after all these years, I'm having real problems with my self esteem. She says she don't know what made her want to cheat. She did admit that her high school boyfriend was better looking. So I feel that I wasn't good looking enough. She says that she adores me and that she lives for me. Well, I'm still the same person that I was twenty years ago, so I wonder who what makes her feel different. Twenty years ago when she was having the affairs, she found sex with me repulsive. I feel she must have found me really ugly or something. Well, I haven't gotten any better looking at age fifty seven. I guess I just don't know why I'm worth being with now. My self esteem is in the gutter. I guess it's been a problem for the last eighteen years since she told me, but it's really gotten bad lately. I guess I'm not sure how to handle this.
In 1996 my wife left me and my children for a cyber lover. In 1999 the call came that she was dead.
I have been married for 29 years, loved and trusted my wife, worked hard and gave her all the best but that somehow wasnít enough. Two years ago I sat down by her pc while she was out and my whole world crumbled. She had been involved in various chat groups over a 6 month period with many other men and the emails that I read confirmed that she had met at least a half a dozen of them. The juicy details in these emails were quite obvious as to what was happening and those involved were in our own town!! She denied everything as they all do and I was so heart broken. She claimed that she only loves me and no other and here I am 2 years later, still married to her and I love her very much, but the truth is really that my wife is a whore and after reading some of those emails, can i ever forget. She says that she has had no contact with any of these guys since and I believe her?
I thought that my relationship with my wife was perfectly normal. I have to say that I trust her completely and she trusted me. We bought a computer and played around with games and such and everything was fine and dandy... then I wanted to get a modem and an IP so I could keep abreast of my hobby, steam locomotion. That is how innocent this started out. Then my wife discovered something called chat. It was the worst thing that could have happened to me. She had no problem getting a screen name and chatting away with these chatters that were lurking in the same city that we were living... They had things called "chat parties" where they would presumably get to know each other as if this were some social mixer. But how can anyone be social with a "handle" like "*******" or "******" These were the names of the people that my wife was cavorting with while I was making a modest income for her and our newborn daughter. The chatting even escalated to phone conversations (that I had the high honour of paying the collect calls that were made to my house) and even sexual liaisons in motel rooms that I, once again, had found that money from the checking account that I replenished had been used for. But the worst thing of all was that she grew distant and cold toward me and our child... she seemed to embrace the filthy lifestyle that this chat seemed to purvey... (they even have a designation I found out called married but looking... aren't they so kind and willing to help?) We are going through a divorce now that I never wanted all because someone wanted a quick blast and the chatroom made it easy to brainwash my wife
Thank God!! I'm married and forty-something, and I truly thought I was the only person in the world who had had this sort of experience with their partner. I can't tell you how much comfort it has given me to find I am not alone. Although your site appears to be U.S. based, this problem seems to be universal.
We were having some trouble after 12 years of marriage and 3 adorable boys. I had spent this 12 yrs in the defense force and recently left for a civilian job, what a mistake. I got caught up in an email romance (no contact)for 6 months and as soon as my wife found out I killed it because I knew what I wanted most of all. I know it should never have happened. But believe me I know how easy it is to get caught up in these things when the other person is telling you all you want to hear. I left home to allow her to find what she had left for me. She kept telling me I had a chance to come home and that she would always love me. She sent me loving messages for a long time. All the while maintaining contact with overseas male friends. Every time she had computer trouble I was there to help her. Every time she wanted to go somewhere I took her. We still kissed and cuddled. Everything I've done in life has been for bettering our standing in life. I got told 1 week that this person was on his way here. I did everything I could to stop him. But it was too late they kept it to themselves long enough for me not to be able to do much. He is now in my house and I have no way of getting him out. She is living in a fantasy world at present. I do not believe she really loves him. But it is almost too late for me now. I don't know if I could take her back if they sleep together. I guess I'll have to wait and see. I love my wife deeply. Like they say you don't know what you've got till it's gone. I can only hope she will wake up from this dream before it's too late. For those who happen to know who the other person is with enough warning. Contact your immigration dept. I did but was not soon enough. They approached him with my concerns but he had already obtained his visa. Deepest sympathy for anyone going through this terrible situation
Last Spring, I set up her computer. She began to learn to use the chat rooms. After a few months, she started asking me, "what would you do if I said I was in love with someone else?" After a few more weeks, she made a trip out of the U.S., to "go visit my cousin." Yeah, sure... I knew where she was going, because I'd found the carelessly left notes, letters, post office box number, phone numbers, e-mail trails, photos. I played it as cool as I could. She moved out of our 250K lake home last week, and got a subsidized apartment. She took her 16 year old daughter, and plans to take our 6 year old son. The guy she met, is as she says, is "a pauper... but he has a lot of ambition and I'm not worried about him." The guy has "sold everything", and will be here in a week to start a new life with her.

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