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The Three Steps to Save Your Relationship and Stop Internet Infidelity

Step 1 - Talk to Your mate

Communication is the cornerstone of any relationship. If you have discovered that your mate is cheating or even if you just suspect it... TALK TO THEM! Get it out into the open. This begins the healing process. If you get that "deer in the headlights" look, as one kind visitor wrote to me, then you probably have a cheater on your hands. Other responses by cheaters may be: "You don't trust me!", "You are just being paranoid" or even the infamous "It's just a little harmless cybersex, what's your problem?" The bottom line... if they are spending too much time on the net and it is bothering you, let them prove to you they are doing nothing wrong. That's right, stand right in front of them and ask them to sign on and prove to you that nothing is happening. Better yet, ask for their passwords and dig for yourself. Tell them whatever you find there, whether it is porn or cheating or something else, you are willing to work it out with them (if you are truly willing to do so). If they refuse, they are probably hiding something. Tell them that you will be watching....and get the Max Keylogger Internet Monitoring Software.

Step 2 - Seek Counseling

Professional counseling can assist you in the discovery of infidelity, healing the wounds caused by it, and the prevention of further strain on your relationship. This fantasy world of internet chat rooms and the like are similar to a powerful drug that can make even the most normal person become addicted. They will lie, cheat and pretty much do anything to get their "fix". The worst part, in most cases, they don't even think they are doing anything wrong. I receive many cheaters that stumble accidently into my "chatcheater" chat room , thinking that it is one of those chat rooms to find cheaters like themselves (it is actually a place for the victims of chat cheating). If they stay long enough to examine their conscience, the response is almost always the same... "What's wrong with a little harmless cybersex?". Sticking with the drug analogy, I look at cybersex as casual drug use that can lead to other "hard core abuses". The path of the typical internet adulterer goes something like this: chat, email, phone calls and then... the rendezvous. In any case, whether they are cheating, viewing porn or even doing nothing at all, counseling should not do any harm and it may assist in strengthening your relationship.

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Step 3 - Monitor All Internet Use

As with any addiction, these chat cheaters need help. My wife and I went to counseling after the first time I caught her sleeping with a man she met on the net. After counseling (with changes needed from both of us), and plenty of time, I thought that our relationship was once again strong. She swore that she would not cheat again, she just wanted the internet to talk with other women because she enjoyed it. I am a computer programmer. I did not need the monitoring software to find out what she was up to. But privacy and mostly TRUST was a very important thing to me and I wanted to believe her and to show her that I trusted her. I have never made a bigger mistake in my life! This is before I knew much about the addiction factor of the net and chat rooms. She was no longer herself, she would do anything to keep her fantasy world intact. She lied to me and she lied to her children. If I had the chance to do it all over again, I would have performed ALL the steps I describe to you here (I only did the first two). It is unfair to the addicted person to allow them the opportunity to cheat. Would you give an alcoholic a bottle of wine and then leave for the day and expect them to have the power to resist it? The problem is, that the internet can be used for many good things and it is wrong to restrict a person from the wealth of good information available on the web. That is why I feel the monitoring software is required. Install it with their knowledge, don't spy on them, but DEFINITELY INSTALL IT!! These people we care about need our help! Whether they want it or not. Max Keylogger Internet Monitoring Software

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